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The Most Common Source of Stress in Relationships Isn't What You Think

November 25, 2017 / Well + Good / Erin Bunch

Healthy romantic relationships can be challenging to maintain. But, hey, if Michelle and Barack can navigate life’s stresses and keep their #relationshipgoals status intact, you and yours can do the same, right?

The key lies in knowing which pitfalls commonly derail couples so that you and your significant other can prepare yourselves to sail through them rather than abandon ship at the first sign of trouble. If you’re thinking you already know which arena causes couples the most stress—money, of course—you wouldn’t be wrong.

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Should You Unfriend Your Politically Different Relative on Facebook?

November 22, 2017 / Nylon / Hayden Manders

Your Thanksgiving dinner will touch on politics this year. It’s inevitable. Because many of today’s hot-button issues are rooted in identity politics, even talking about ourselves is political now. But what about those conversations or comments that happen after you’ve said your goodbyes and sent your well-wishes? What about the debates that continue online, in your curated newsfeed and in front of everyone in your social network? You’d think by now, after a year living in the most politically divided time many of us have ever experienced, we’d know the proper ways to go about political differences online, but alas. 

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How Sexual Harassment Can Damage Your Health

November 6, 2017 / Huffington Post / Ally Hirschlag

Tristan Coopersmith, a psychotherapist and founder of Life Lab, a women’s sanctuary in Los Angeles, says the psychological and physical toll of these cases can range from minor to severe.

“Safety, security and self-worth all take a major hit when a woman is sexually harassed,” Coopersmith told HuffPost, describing consequences like depression, ruminating thoughts and “pervasive and loud shame tapes and lowered self-worth that ultimately can lead to depressive and anxious symptoms if not treated.”

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9 Reasons Why You Can Benefit from Therapy Even If You Don't Have a Mental Illness

November 6, 2017 / Insider / Kristin Salaky

When you think of therapy, you may think of an intense and intimidating process strictly for people who struggle with mental illness. But there are countless styles and settings for therapy, which means there's something out there for anyone.

In fact, there are more people who are benefiting from therapy than you might think. According to a survey from the American Psychology Association, 27 percent of Americans have received treatment or therapy from a mental health professional. Here are just a few reasons why you may want to look into joining them, even if you don't believe you have a mental illness.

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You're An Adult - Help Your Parents Get the Memo

October 28, 2017 / Brit + Co / Kathryn Watson

 

There’s nothing quite like the thrill of successfully navigating an adult milestone for the first time. Whether it’s purchasing that first vehicle, moving in with a partner, or simply stashing some money in savings, we feel (at least for one second) like we’ve got it all together. After we’ve put the outside world in its place, folded laundry, paid all of our bills, and made a slow-cooker soup from scratch all in the span of a typical Tuesday, we deserve to feel proud of what we’re accomplishing and who we are becoming. Unfortunately, for many of us, an audience of critics is watching our every move, ready to pounce and berate us over a small mistake. In many instances, those critics are the very people we would hope to have in our corner: our parents.

 
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13 Life Changing Tips for A Happy Long-Term Relationship

October 17, 2017 / Bustle / Carina Wolff

 

For many people, it sounds satisfying to have a life-long partner to share the journey with, but you also don't want to end up like those stereotypically-miserable married couples who bicker endless. To avoid this plight, you'll want to know all the life-changing tips to ensure a happy, long-term relationship. Although every couple is different, there are a number of habits and mindsets that apply across the board, and keeping in them in mind can help you cultivate the type of serious relationship you desire.

"New love is a dopamine party for the brain, giving us that happy, high, addictive, infatuated feeling," says psychotherapist Tristan Coopersmith over email. "Then we transition to a more oxytocin-dominated love signified by feelings of security, devotion, and trust. We need to work to continue emitting oxytocin. We need to intently listen, kiss, hug, massage and notice each other. So often in relationships we begin to take each other for granted, falling victim to routines and skipping over the things that really water our love. Essentially a relationship is like a garden, if you water it, it grows, if you don't, it withers."

If you're in it for the long-haul and want the happiest relationship possible, consider these 13 life-changing tips for a happy, long-term relationship.

 

Is Cuffing Season Real? Here's Why People Crave Relationships in Colder Months, According to Science

October 16, 2017 / Bustle / Kristine Fellizar

 

Regardless of whether you love it or hate it, believe in its existence or not, cuffing season takes place in the colder months. In fact, it's right around the corner, beginning on November 5. Introduced back in 2011 on Urban Dictionary, cuffing season is that time of the year when really single people get serious about finding someone to "cuff," cuddle, or just be with for (at the very least) the colder months of the year. If you don't really believe it's a thing, there is some legitimate science behind it.

"We slow down in the fall," Tristan Coopersmith, licensed psychotherapist and founder of Life Lab, tells Bustle. "Summer is a busy time. There's a feeling of wanting to get all the fun and freedom in. So by the time fall hits, we're all pretty spent and just want to (Netflix and) chill. Serial dating takes too much effort we just don't have post-summer."

 

Am I Compatible with my Partner? 7 Signs You and Your Partner Don't Share the Same Values

October 16, 2017 / Bustle / Suzzanah Weiss

 

Most people don’t care if their partners share their style or music taste, but many want partners who share their values. After all, our values dictate how we act in every situation. So, people with incompatible values are prone to rubbing each other the wrong way.

A relationship can only work between two people with conflicting values if they both feel free to hold and express those values, Divorce and Women’s Empowerment Coach Heather Debreceni tells Bustle. However, this can get tricky. People often end up feeling like they can’t express their conflicting values without getting into an argument, so they suppress them. This can make you feel like you’re losing yourself in the relationship.

Another thing to think about is which values are most important to you, Tristan Coopersmith, licensed psychotherapist and founder of LifeLab, tells Bustle. For example, maybe you’d prefer your significant other be punctual, but you could date a chronically late person if they’re also passionate about social justice. You may be able to compromise on some values but not others.

Here are some signs you and your partner don’t really see eye to eye on the things held nearest and dearest to your hearts

 

What Is Mindfulness? Here’s What Happened When I Tried It

July 18, 2017 / Dermstore / Kaitlin Willow 

Mindfulness is one of those buzzwords that has sort of lost its meaning over time. How many times have you heard the phrase, “Be mindful,” without actually knowing what it entails? So much more than a trendy word, mindfulness is a powerful way of thinking with mental, physical and emotional benefits.

I chatted with Tristan Coopersmith, Chief Inspirologist of Life Lab in Hermosa Beach, California—a women’s wellness studio dedicated to empowerment, healing and self-love. We met one morning in Life Lab’s “Zen Den” room to discuss mindfulness, meditation and making positive changes. We dug into some of the misconceptions surrounding the practice of mindfulness, the physical and mental benefits and how to incorporate mindfulness techniques into your daily life.

As someone who can never turn off her brain, I was skeptical about whether mindfulness is something I’d ever be able to do. But Tristan, who is also a licensed psychotherapist, quickly dispels this way of thinking. “Mindfulness is not about stopping your thoughts,” she says. “It’s about quieting their power.”

What does all of it mean—being mindful and quieting the power of your thoughts?

 
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Meet Tristan Coopersmith of Life Lab in Hermosa Beach

April 3, 2017 / VoyageLA Magazine / VoyageLA Staff

Thanks for sharing your story with us Tristan. So, let’s start at the beginning and we can move on from there.
When I found myself on my bathroom floor, door locked, ala Elizabeth Gilbert in Eat Pray Love… I knew something in my life had to shift. So the next day, with sheer impulsivity and just enough of a sprinkle of faith, I quit my highly desirable, glamorous and successful career as a trend forecaster. Destination completely unknown...
Fast forward 6 years later and the idea of Life Lab was born… purely out of a selfish desire to create a space to connect with other bold, beautiful women who wanted to create lives that they were unapologetically madly in love with, I built the sanctuary now known today as Life Lab. Combining the 3 pillars of my own personal growth journey, mindfulness, creativity and soul work, Life Lab offers fresh, vibrant, inspiring, head and heart provoking experiences for women to connect, support and celebrate each other, develop an unshakable core of self-love and commitment to personal development, surrender to a calmer, more mindful and intentional life… and have fun through immersive and creative activities.
 

Hermosa Beach's Life Lab: a Pinterest board come to life

January 4, 2017 / The Beach Reporter / Genie Davis

Founder Tristan Coopersmith is a licensed psychotherapist with a small private practice in the beach cities, and a background as a trend forecaster. And one of the trends she uncovered from a therapeutic standpoint was a need for personal connection, particularly among women. Calling Life Lab a “gym for your spirit,” Coopersmith established a mix of classes designed to help people create a life they love.
Focusing on experiential programs for women felt natural for Coopersmith.
“I have found that many women are missing real connection and vulnerability in their lives. I started thinking that people needed a space to connect to each other and to create better, more purposeful, and happier lives, to create relationships not based on food, or working out,” she said.